Jacynta Clayton from WORK180 joins us to discuss her career story. Hear how she manages her career with being a Mum.
Can you tell me about your career story to date – where did you start and what your path looked like?
My career started in hospitality. At first the casual-style work was easy to balance with my university studies. But when my partner became an Australian Defence Member, it seemed to make sense to continue to take casual work in restaurants and pubs while we had to travel frequently for his role.
I loved the people I met, and the pace of the work so I didn’t mind.
But there was this little niggle in the back of my head – usually while I was on my hands and knees scrubbing out a glass washer or polishing the 87th knife of the day that I was made for a bit more.
My managers noticed it too. They asked if I wanted to take on a management role. But by then I was saving for a wedding, and I knew that I could earn more on a casual rate than I could on a salary. So that opportunity went unanswered.
At what stage did you have children?
After my wedding, my now-husband and I knew we wanted to have kids right away, and luckily enough my first son was born exactly 9 months after the honeymoon.
But becoming a manager now that I wasn’t saving for a wedding never came up again in those 9 months.
I worked up until the very day I was booked to be induced (I wasn’t going to give up a half day on Sunday rates!) but didn’t go back. In fact, my husband was posted not long after the birth and we had to move towns.
How long did you take out of the workforce?
When my first son was about 6 months old I decided to start picking up work in hospitality again in the new town.
After having children, what, if anything, changed for you career wise?
I realised this time though that I didn’t want to work in a bar all my life. I had wanted to pursue a career in writing since I was a child but had always thought it was just a fantasy. Now with a child of my own I wanted to set an example of following your career dreams. So, I started a second university degree – this time in professional writing and publishing. I took it slow, studying online and part time. Often working on assignments until 2am when I had time to myself outside of work and family.
Management popped up as a possibility again at the new restaurant I was working at. But the rostering system as a manager didn’t allow for the routine’s I needed to accommodate my life as a mother. Changes to the roster were made from week to week, whereas I needed more structure to accommodate day care availabilities.
Three years of waitressing and slow progress with my degree, and I found myself finishing an assignment from a hospital bed as I awaited another inducement for my second son. Now I had twice the motivation to show what it meant to follow your career dreams.
This time I gave myself a week off between my last shift at the restaurant and giving birth. But I didn’t make it back to that restaurant either. Life as a Defence spouse also runs in three-year sprints, and once again we found ourselves moving towns with a newborn.
I knew I only wanted two kids. So, after this move, I didn’t look for hospitality work again. This time I wanted something that would help me with my degree. Eventually I found a role as an Account Executive at an employer branding & recruitment marketing agency. There I was able to really sink my teeth into work I’d always wanted to do.
Five years later, and I’ve moved towns again, and found a new role as Global Content Editor & Writer at WORK180. Their remote and flexible working model has been a godsend when it comes to both my career progression and finding my work-life balance. And I know that I’m making myself and my family proud with the work I do.
What skills do you think you have learnt from being a mum?
Empathy is probably a big one. Resilience is probably another.
Empathy because children can’t always communicate their feelings. Whether because they don’t understand them, or they haven’t learnt the words to describe them. So, a lot of my job as a parent is to see the world from their perspective, try and understand their feelings, and let them know that I understand.
And resilience because I’m constantly having to respond, adapt and grow to every new challenge children throw at us, often with the blind optimistic mantra of ‘this is just a phase’.
What does work/life balance look like for you, and do you have this?
Work/life balance could never be captured into a single perfect frozen representation. It’s fluid and ever changing. What that balance looks like today might be completely different to what it will look like three weeks from today. Some days I don’t have it all, and others I feel like a rockstar the way I’ve navigated it all. For me it all comes down to my bucket.
A lot of mums with school-age children might know the analogy – but for those that don’t: everyone has a bucket that represents your mental state, and certain tasks, or interactions with other people can either fill your bucket or empty it.
It’s not about avoiding all instances that will empty the bucket. Housework empties my bucket, but I need to do my share. Heavy creative work is something I love doing – but it also drains my bucket. The trick is to remember to do things that fill it back up afterwards. For me that might look like a walk with the family or going out by myself for a pedicure.
What tips would you share for having balance?
Set boundaries. It may be that you don’t answer work emails after 6pm. Or on the flip side, it may be that the kids aren’t allowed in your home work office. Whatever works for you.
Then once you have the boundaries, protect them. And to borrow the wise words of Oprah, remember that “’no’ is a complete sentence”. Resist the overwhelming urge to justify why you are saying ‘no’. I think women can struggle with protecting their sense of balance more than knowing what will create it. I know I’ve certainly struggled with it. But when I do remember, my life runs all the smoother.